Have you ever said that you want to stop doing something or change something in your life? Maybe you want to stop eating junk food or you want to stop smoking. You might want to lose weight or get a better more fulfilling job. Have you ever felt that accomplishing these things feels like a losing battle?
A big part of the reason might be that you are focusing to much on the problem. It’s sort of like saying I am not going to think about a purple giraffe. The minute you say that, you start thinking about it. We are all wired in such a way that whatever you think about continues to dominate your mind, so thinking about a problem will ensure that it fills you with worry and obsession.
Instead fill your mind with what you will change. For instance instead of saying I want to eat healthier, say I will eat broccoli every day for dinner as my new habit. Pick one thing that you will do differently that is better. When you do it this way, you set yourself up for success because it is not such a huge challenge to go after. It is also better because it is simple and concrete. You will ad broccoli to your diet. That is such a simple concept. You buy the broccoli and every day you see it there ready for you.
Regardless of what you want to change find something new to do that will be a better way for you. Instead of becoming obsessed about what you do wrong, let yourself become obsessed about that new thing that you are doing right. This is what people at the top of their game do, such as top performing salesmen and top performing athletes. They have routines that are regular, consistent and reinforce the behavior they want. Try it out, leave me a comment, let me know how this works out for you.